The Journey To Baby Frankie

The pregnancy journey wasn't at all what I expected. Don't get me wrong I enjoyed it and the ending product was my beautiful son but there's so many things that we as pregnant women must go through. Perhaps I was the only one that went through this or maybe there are a bunch of women that had similar feelings as I did about pregnancy....that something was going to go wrong. When I first found out I was pregnant I was nervous and excited. Nervous because I wondered if I was cut out to be a mother and I didn't quite know what to expect. I was excited because I have always known I wanted to be a mother. I would look at children with their mothers and say wow I cant wait for that to be me one day. You never truly know all the tests, worrying, and stress other pregnant women go through. They gave me so many test. Test I didn't even know existed or that I would have to go through. I did my research and knew what I was in store for. Every GYN visit was met with the same anxiety "I hope they don't tell me something is wrong." One visit that informed me that I had a mutated gene for cystic fibrosis and that my son had a 20 percent chance to have it if my fiancee' carried that gene as well. In the doctor's exact words "Your child will eventually have to have a lung transplant and life for children with that disease is hard but you will have to meet with the genetic counselor to get more info." At that particular moment between balling my eyes out and trying to understand what they were telling me I realized I loved my baby more than anything. I went through that week wait crying non stop and going internet crazy trying to find anything on cystic fibrosis. I went to the genetic counselor's appointment knowing statistics off the top of my head. I was prepared. They wanted me to do an amnio to see if the baby had the disease and I thought about it and said I was going to just put it in God's hands and I wasn't going to do the amnio. I would not interfere with his plan for me. I was prepared for whatever was in store for me. I loved my child and would accept him however he came. I tried to not stress myself out for a while if the thought came to my head I would brush it off. Of course the thought of something unexpected happening to him came across my head so I would always feel for fetal kicks obsessively. Fast forwarding to my delivery day.

My day started off regular but I noticed that I kept leaking discharge. Luckily I had an appointment that day so I could ask the doctor was it normal. I hated asking the doctor any type of concern because they always brushed it off with "oh that normal" and looked at me as if I had twenty heads for worrying about things. My doctor (who I will NEVER go to again) already labeled me as a complicated pregnancy because I went to the hospital because I had a stomach virus and cramping. Some doctor's make people feel stupid for going to the hospital when you are being nothing but a concerned first time parent. Anyway, I went to my doctor's appointment alarmed because I didn't know if I was leaking discharge or amniotic fluid. She gave me the brush off saying that if it was my water it would be a large gush a water and not a drip. Something still didn't sit right but I stood quiet and reassured myself she is a doctor so she must know what she is talking about. She told me if the leaking persisted to go to the hospital. That whole night I kept feeling a little leaking here and there but not enough to say oh that's my water. I just felt uneasy so I told my fiancee and we decided the next day to go to the hospital. We waited about 2 hours. In those two hours I saw a lot of women in full throttle labor and got scared. I said I'll opt to wait 3 additional weeks because at that time I was 37 weeks. I wanted my son to come early but women screaming and in actual labor scared me at that moment. It just became REAL. The doctor asked me what brought me there and I explained. She said it was probably nothing. She ran a test to see if it was discharge or amniotic fluid. My fiancee' asked me if I wanted to give birth today? My exact words were HELL NO I'll wait my 3 more weeks. The doctor came back with a smile I figured she was going to make me feel dumb by it being another false alarm. She said congrats your water broke you will be having your baby by tonight or early tomorrow. I swear it sounded like she was joking so she repeated herself. My fiancee then called everyone telling them the news and I stood there in shock. I didn't even have anything prepared. My mind was racing. They jump started me on pitocin and we waited. 35 hours later I wasn't even dilated a centimeter. I decided for myself that I was going to get a c-section. The doctor had told me I would have to wait another day or two and I thought to myself "what if my son goes into distress?" or "what if he gets an infection for having been exposed to bacteria because he was no longer being protected by his amniotic sac?"I told the doctors that I wanted a C-section. They tried to talk me out of it but I told them my reasons. They couldn't argue against them because at that point I was 35 hours with no sleep what strength would have to push him out? All the doctor's told me all the risk and my future mother in law, aunt, and fiancee were all telling me to "stick it out" for another day or two but my mother was on my side. I explained to them why I was doing it but at that point it didn't matter to me. I knew what was right for me at that moment. A nurse came in to get me "operation ready" and she looked at me and said you're making the right choice. It made me feel so much better because everyone was against my choice except my mother. Soon I was in the operating room and they tried to numb me from the waist down but the epidurals weren't working because it was put in wrong so I decided to be put to sleep. When I woke up I was freezing cold and shaking. They informed me the baby was fine and was be put into observation to make sure he didn't have an infection due to being exposed for a long period of time outside of the amniotic sac. I closed my eyes and was glad it was over . I awoke to my fiancee and future mother in law telling me how cute my son was and I was just relieved that he was okay. He was born on June 19th 2011 on father's day. I couldn't sleep the twelve hours I waited to see him. I was too excited. In that time the surgeon that performed my surgery came to see me and said that it was a good choice I had made the decision to have a c-section. He stated they could have given me pitocin till the cows came home I wasn't going to deliver my son vaginally. He said they had a record of my temperature and that it kept going up and that I was getting a fever. Had I gotten a fever the infection could of spread to the baby. He also said he was going to tell the doctor who didn't want to run the test to check if it was my amniotic sac something because that was extremely dumb on her part. I named my son Franklyn Lorenzo Jr. after his father , but I call him Frankie for short. He was born June 19th 2011 and was 6 pounds 10 ounces and 19 inches long. He was negative for cystic fibrosis and I thank God everyday for giving me a healthy boy. Through this whole experience I learned that go with your gut instinct if you don't feel comfortable say something because you know your body better than anyone.